Blue Silk Pyjamas

Husband called his wife on the phone: “Honey I’ve been asked to go fishing in China with my boss for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get the promotion. So could you please pack enough clothes for a week, set out my rod & fishing box. We’re leaving from office & I’ll swing by the house to pick my things. Oh, Please pack my new blue silk pyjamas!”

The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy, but being a good wife she did exactly as her husband said.

The following weekend he came home a little tired but looking good…

The wife welcomed him & asked if he caught many fish?

The husband said “Yes dear, we caught lots of salmon, blue gill and a few swordfish.

But, let me ask you something – why didn’t u pack my blue silk pyjamas?”

And, ladies and gentlemen, I really think that you’ll love the answer…!! She says, “I did, they’re in your fishing box”.

The Law Student Inspirational Story

A student failed in law & decided to make a deal with professor.
Sir, do you know everything about law?
Prof: Yes.

Student: If you can answer this question, i will accept my final marks, if you cant, you have to give me "A" Grade.
Professor agreed.

Boy asked: "What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?"
Prof thought about it for hours & pondered no answer.

He had to finally give up as he really did not know.
He gave the boy his "A" Grade.

The following day, professor asked same question to his students.
He was shocked when all of them raised their hands.

He asked one student.

He answered: Sir, you are 65, married to 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical.
Your wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, this is logical but not legal.
Your wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet you have given him an "A" Grade, This is neither logical nor legal.

The professor collapsed..

Romantic Date

A man and a woman were having a quiet, romantic dinner in a fine restaurant.

They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.

The waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the woman slowly sliding down her chair and under the table but the man stared straight ahead.

The waitress watched as the woman slid all the way down her chair and out of sight under the table.

Still, the man stared straight ahead. The waitress, thinking this behavior a bit risque and worried that it might offend other diners, went over to the table and, tactfully, began by saying to the man: "Pardon me, sir, but I think your wife just slid under the table."

Man replied: "Naah.. She just arrived in the restaurant..!"

Presence of mind helps, Never Panic....!!!

In a shop a man asked for 1/2 kg of butter.

The salesperson, a young boy, said that only 1kg packs were available in the shop,

but the man insisted on buying only 1/2 kg.


So the boy went inside to the manager's room and said "An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 kg of butter".
To his surprise, the customer was standing right behind him..!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!

So the boy added immediately, "And this gentleman wants to buy the other half!!!!!!".

After the customer left, the manager said "You have saved your position by being clever enough at the right time. Where do you come from?"


To this the boy said, "I come from Brazil. The place consists of only prostitutes and football players!!!!!"


The manager replied coldly, "My wife is also from Brazil ".


To this the boy asked excitedly, "Oh yeah? Which team does she plays for?"

Corporate Lesson: Presence of mind helps, Never Panic....!!!

11 Things You May REGRET in 15 years

1. Staying in the job you hate

2. Staying in a destructive relationship

3. Settling for less than you deserve

4. Not spending enough time with the loved ones. Children grow up faster than we think, parents
grow older faster than we would like

5. Not creating enough loyal friends and colleagues

6.Not doing enough for your people

7. Not taking care of your health

8. Not taking time to learn new things

9. Worrying too much. Worry saps energy of today without contributing anything to tomorrow.

10. Not spending enough time on things you like Travel, sports, leisure, etc

11. Not allowing yourself to be happy with what you have reacting rather than responding no day is a scrap page in the book of life; being happy is a choice.

Email Id Story

A jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy' at XYZ company.

The HR manager interviewed him, then gave him a test: clean the floor. The man passed the test with flying colors. "You are hired,"
HR manager informed the applicant, "give me your e-mail address, and I'll send you the application for employment, as well as the date you should report for work.

The man replied " I don't have a computer, or an email!" "I'm sorry," said the HR manager. "If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And we cannot hire persons who do not exist."

The man was very disappointed.

He didn't know what to do. He only had $10 with him. Once that is spent, he won't have any money to buy any food.

He went to the supermarket and bought a crate of tomatoes with his $10. He went from door to door and sold the tomatoes in less than two hours. He doubled his money. He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with $60.

He realized that he can survive this way. He started to go everyday earlier, and return late. He doubled or tripled his money every day. Soon, he bought a cart, then a truck.

In a very short time, he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.

Five years later, the man became one of the biggest food retailers in the U. S.

He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance. He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan. At the end of the conversation, the broker asked him for his email address. The man replied: ' I don't have an email.' The broker was dumbfounded. "You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded in building an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?," he exclaimed. The man thought for a while, and replied, "an office boy at XYZ company!"

If you just lost your Job or Just failed an Interview Don't worry be Optimistic..... Good days are on the way and something better is reserved for you.

All you have to do is Explore, Innovate and Explore !!!

Citizen Vs Politician

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.
The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'Thank You' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a grocer comes in for a haircut, and when he tried to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you , I'm doing community service this week.

The grocer was happy and left the shop.
The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'Thank You' card and a bag of fresh vegetables waiting for him at his door.

Then a politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week..

The politician was very happy and left the shop.
The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut.

And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it. 

An Ultimate Bargain

A Gujju calls a Dentist to inquire about the cost for tooth extraction...
Dentist : Rs 850 Sir.

Gujju : Rs 850..!!! Too much..!! Don't you have anything cheaper?
Dentist : That's the normal charge, Sir.

Gujju : What if you don't use any anaesthetic?
Dentist : That's unusual, Sir, but can be done and will cut the cost by Rs 400.

Gujju : Ok. And what if you deploy one of your trainee-dentists to do the extraction, without anaesthetic?
Dentist : Well, I cannot guarantee professionalism and it also would be painful. But the price could drop down to Rs 150.

Gujju: Hmm. What if you make it like a training-session, like one of your students does the extraction, while the other students watch and learn?
Dentist : It'll be good for the students but quite traumatic for the patient... And I can pay you Rs 200 for it.

Gujju : Now you're talking..!! Ok, it's a deal. Can I confirm an appointment for my mother-in-law for tomorrow at 10 AM then?

Chicken Story

A farmer owns 25 young hens and one male...

As he feels that the old male could no longer handle his job efficiently, the farmer bought one young male from the market...

Old Male to YoungMale:

Old male: Welcome to join me, we will work together towards productivity...
Young Male: What do you mean? As far as I know, you are old & should be retired.

Old Male : Young boy, there are 25 hens here, can't I help you with some?
Young Male: No!! Not even one, all of them will be mine.

Old Male: In this case, I shall challenge you to a competition & if I win you shall allow me to have one hen & if I lose you will have all.
Young Male: OKKK.. What kind of competition?

Old Male: 50 meters run. From here to that tree. But due to my age, I hope you allow me to start off the first 10 meters.
Young Male: No problem ! We will compete tomorrow morning.

In the morning the YoungMale allows the Old male to start off & when the Old male crosses the 10 meters mark the Young Male chases him with all his might.
Soon enough, he was behind the Old male's back in a matter of seconds.

Suddenly..."BANG"!!!

Before he could overtake the old male , he was shot dead by the farmer...

who cursed, : "Hell" This is the 5th GAY Male I've bought this week." ??


Moral: beware of senior experience in corporate politics !!!!!

iPhone 7 Vs Charming Girl’s Love (Dad’s Little Princess)

iPhone - Last week, one of my friend posted status on FB as "iPhone is class, rest all are not"

Yes, I do understand people are crazy about iPhone just for a showoff (Sorry iPhone Lovers, yes for showoff)

Like every Indian teenager, one CHARMING Girl Name: Pihu is also crazy about iPhone. She is just 17 but still she wants iPhone 7 because most of her friends are having iPhone.

Pihu is a youngest and only child of her parents. Her father is working for a MNC as a Senior Manager, he never refused any demand of her pretty Princess Pihu. Her mother is a housewife.

Pihu loves shopping, and also wants to become a Model. Most of time she dresses up like a Model

One Day

Pihu: Dad, I want iPhone 7 as all my friends are having iPhone.

Dad: Hmmm

Pihu: Dad, please give me iPhone 7,,, please please please

Dad: Hmmm

Pihu (Little Bit Aggressive): Dad, are you listening?

Dad: Yes

Pihu: Dad, please gift me iPhone 

Dad: Wait, I'm busy with my office work. Give me some time.

AFTER 10 MINS

Pihu (Naughty Smile): Dad, iPhone 7

Dad: Okay Dear, tomorrow we'll go out and buy new iPhone.

Pihu (Full of smiling face): Love You Dad, Love you so much

Dad: Love you too sweetheart, now go and have your dinner.

NEXT DAY - Early Morning

Pihu: Dad, dad, dad, wake up its 8o'clock

Dad: Hmmm

Pihu: Dad, come-on

Dad: Okay

Pihu (With naughty smile): At what time, we'll go to shopping mall?

Dad: Evening 5 or 6?

Pihu: No, it will be too late

Dad: Okay evening 4

Pihu: No, we'll go around 11:30AM

Dad (Surprise): Okay

Her Dad knows, she's desperate about iPhone

AT SHOPPING MALL

Sale Person: Hello Sir and Madam, How can I help you?

Dad: We are looking for iPhone 7

Sale Person: Sir, iPhone 7 with 128 GB memory or more?

Pihu: 256GB, Sir

Dad (Shocking and thinking my laptop capacity is 500GB only): Okay

Sale Person: Which color do you want to buy? Black or

In middle

Pihu: Pink only

Sale Person: Okay Mam, sure. Anything else?

Pihu: Yes, back cover also

Dad (Shocking Reaction): Why??

Pihu: Dad, it's too costly. I don't want any scratch on this

Dad: Oh my Son.

Pihu: Dad, what happened?

Dad (Deep Breath): Listen son, you want to protect this iPhone with cover which is just a device. Can you please tell me how can I protect my priceless Princess?

Pihu (Shocked): Who?

Dad: You, my princess

Pihu: Why, what happened Dad?

Dad: Look my Princess, how people are staring at you (because she's in shorts). Can you tell me how can I protect you from these society scratches?

It's not about the dressing sense it's just about the LOVE and CARE, which her Dad showed about her.

Pihu (Thinking and Thinking): Blank

Dad: What happened dear?

Pihu: Don't know dad.

Dad: Yes, iPhone is costly but in front of you that is nothing.

The Indian Doctor

An Indian Doctor can't find a job in a Hospital in the US, so he opens a clinic and puts a sign outside 'GET TREATMENT FOR $20 - IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100.'

An American lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.
Lawyer: "I have lost my sense of taste."
Indian: "Nurse, bring medicine from box No. 22 and put 3 drops in patient's mouth."

Lawyer: "Ugh. this is kerosene."
Indian: "Congrats, your sense of taste is restored. Give me $20."

The annoyed lawyer goes back after a few days to recover his money.
Lawyer: "I have lost my memory. I cannot remember anything."
Indian: "Nurse, bring medicine from box no. 22 and put 3 drops in his mouth."

Lawyer (annoyed): "This is kerosene. You gave this to me last time for restoring my taste."
Indian: "Congrats. You got your memory back. Give me $20."

The fuming lawyer pays him, and then comes back a week later determined to get back $100.
Lawyer: "My eyesight has become very weak I can't see at all."
Indian: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that, so take this $100."

Lawyer (staring at the note): "But this is $20, not $100!!"
Indian: "Congrats, your eyesight is restored. Give me $20"

You can't beat Indian Doctors

It is my Mistake -- I accept it...

Mistakes Happen..... How many times have we actually accepted it as our own ? Just ask 15-time Grammy Award winner, Adele. If you guys saw her Grammy awards performance you know what I am talking about.

She was only moments into her tribute to George Michael, when she stopped and asked to restart the song because it didn’t sound right. At this point of time I actually thought about my work (I know weird) but I am quite odd that way. Recently I experience something very similar when I was giving a presentation and I stopped as I thought it was not making any sense. I took a few moments and restarted only to be applauded by him.

But back to Adele, instead of being ridiculed, scorned or shunned, she's experiencing the exact opposite. Tweets are coming in from all over the globe celebrating Adele's courage to acknowledge her mistake, start over and deliver what was ultimately an amazing performance.

We may not all be on the Grammy stage with the eyes of the world upon us, but we can learn from Adele's courage and ability to embrace making mistakes. We are all human and we are all learners.

So let aside your failures and fear and let us put experience and learning at center stage. Please let me know if you have had similar experiences.

Lesson To Everyone

A son took his old father to a restaurant for an evening dinner.

Father being very old and weak, while eating, dropped food on his shirt and trousers. Others diners watched him in disgust while his son was calm.

After he finished eating, his son who was not at all embarrassed, quietly took him to the wash room, wiped the food particles, removed the stains, combed his hair and fitted his spectacles firmly.

When they came out, the entire restaurant was watching them in dead silence, not able to grasp how someone could embarrass themselves publicly like that.

The son settled the bill and started walking out with his father.

At that time, an old man amongst the diners called out to the son and asked him, “Don’t you think you have left something behind?”.

The son replied, “No sir, I haven’t”.

The old man retorted, “Yes, you have! You left a lesson for every son and hope for every father“.